Well I created this blog this morning, because I was inspired by an acquaintance (possibly a friend). I created my account this morning, and couldn't think of a title. I wanted it to be an attention getter or something profound. This is what I got. Who knew it was more ironic than profound.

I make my living as a professional ballet dancer. Sounds glamorous, right? It can be at times. Today was not one of those days. Some of us had our yearly meetings with the artistic director today to evaluate how we are doing mentally, physically, artistically, etc... In the past year and a half I felt I had made huge self improvements. Whether it was pure technique or performance quality. Things were going well.

This is my 6th year with the company. I'm the senior most male company member. I feel like I come in, do my job, try to work on my weaknesses, fix things that went wrong yesterday, have fun with my fellow dancers and go home. Recently though I feel that I've been overlooked when it comes to casting, and that I only get opportunities to dance the lead roles when someone gets hurt and there's no one else to go on.

Today seemed like a good time to bring up these thoughts in my evaluation. I said my peace, and then was prepared for our director's turn to speak. He says I'm coasting most of them time, and not pushing myself enough. And he wants me to open up more as a performer and an artist.

I'm a very private person by nature. I only have 2 or 3 friends I'm comfortable enough with to tell them everything. Maybe not even everything, but most things.

Anyway, enough "woe is me" for today. Just thought it was ironic that this is titled "The Man Behind the Artist." Then I come to find out there's not much of an artist there, and maybe not even much of a man either.